polaroid land camera 320

first two shots!

Polaroid Land Camera 320
Polaroid 669 Film

Carnet de Voyage

"My eyes burning and hand crumbling, I felt like I was performing some pathetic martyrdom -- but for what cause?
...to break the language barrier?
...to win the favor of strangers?
...to distract myself from heartbreak?
...to commit slow suicide?"

I bought this from my favorite local comic book store, telling myself I'd read it when I finish my final project next week but alas, I read it all in one sitting after sneaking a peek at the first two pages. This is basically a sketch journal, complete with written narrative, of the time that artist/author Craig Thompson (of Blankets & Goodbye, Chunky Rice) took traveling and researching for his upcoming book Habibi. Upon viewing the images and reading the words, the reader feels the same excitement, anxiety and weariness of the 'wandering artist' and how one copes with being away from home by finding solace in (new) good friends and small comforts. I find out next week whether or not I get to study abroad in Asia this upcoming summer, so if I do, Carnet de Voyage is a great source of inspiration for the level of documentation I plan to execute; if I do not make the program, then it's just all the more reason for me to keep draw-draw-drawing. :)

I love my dogs

Only photos of BB. (Max can't hold a pose as well as she can.)

you must protect it

"You cannot betray your identity for too long, or it will die. If you hear it screaming, if it undergoes the slightest torture, you must protect it, you must be your own rescuer."

Goodbye, Chunky Rice

"There is no goodbye, Chunky Rice."

hasselblad.

look what arrived today.

Dan and Trevor, we are going to have much too much fun with this. I can't wait.

free ways

one of the slides I shot for my photo class. exposure something like ten seconds.

"the faint cry of freeway like that of sickly lungs expelling final wheezes of suffering before deflating at last in the presence of cold death...the rainbow that streaks across the night sky bears no witness but assembles regardless, illumined by moons & smaller satellites no less bright...must have been the eye of death to peer upon the living, communicating their will to the slumbering Grave Diggers"

I miss him. in a lazy way.

excerpt - The Happy Birthday of Death

from "DEATH"

Let's all die
Let's practice a little
Let's play dead for a couple of hours

Let's everybody weave elegant everlasting cerements
build fantastic tombs
carve lifelong coffins
and devise great ways to die let's!
Let's walk under ladders, cross the paths of black cats,
break mirrors, burn rabbit feet, snip the 4th petal,
Yes! Let's draw the ACE OF SPADES --
Let's sleep with our doors unlocked


--Gregory Corso, The Happy Birthday of Death

if I got stranded on a desert island...

It has been a while. I was going to do a desert island survey, but halfway realized it was too stupid to go on, so I deleted it and all that remains of the original post is the title.

I have been gone a while. I wish I had a cool reason but really it's because I reverted to the analog method of blogging - writing with pen on paper. But I return to this blog to say hello, because I don't want this thing to lie dormant. No one really reads this, and that's okay. It's how it should be.

I've a lot to do this Sunday night, but I'm taking my sweet time getting around to completing my assignments. A better life update to come, later.

Blankets

This one is absolutely perfect. I read it while listening to Sigur Ros. I can't even believe how many of the same childhood thoughts I shared with the novelist/artist Craig Thompson, though not as eloquently, nor poetic, nor as heart-wrenching. This is the first book of my adulthood that has made me cry.

excerpt - Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

"How many more nights and weird mornings can this terrible shit go on? How long can the body and the brain tolerate this doom-struck craziness? This grinding of teeth, this pouring of sweat, this pounding of blood in the temples...small blue veins gone amok in front of the ears, sixty and seventy hours with no sleep..."

--Chapter 11, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, by Hunter S. Thompson

Brazil (1985)

Terry Gilliam's brilliant take on a 1984-ish world, wrought with stunning visuals, excellent themes and wonderful acting.

excerpt - Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?

"You will be required to do wrong no matter where you go. It is the basic condition of life, to be required to violate your own identity. At some time, every creature which lives must do so. It is the ultimate shadow, the defeat of creation; this is the curse at work, the curse that feeds on all life. Everywhere in the universe."

--Chapter 15, Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? by Philip K. Dick

La Jetée (1962)

I watched this two years ago and it did not invoke the same effect it did for me today upon my second viewing. It gave me unbelievable chills.

excerpt - The Rum Diary

She laughed. "It won't last. Nothing lasts. But I'm happy now."

"Happy," I muttered, trying to pin the word down. But it is one of those words, like Love, that I have never quite understood. Most people who deal in words don't have much faith in them and I am no exception--especially the big ones like Happy and Love and Honest and Strong. They are too elusive and far too relative when you compare them to sharp, mean little words like Punk and Cheap and Phony. I feel at home with these, because they're scrawny and easy to pin, but the big ones are tough and it takes either a priest or a fool to use them with any confidence.

--Chapter Five, The Rum Diary by Hunter S. Thompson

excerpt - Something Wicked This Way Comes

"So, in sum, what are we? We are the creatures that know and know too much. That leaves us with such a burden again we have a choice, to laugh or cry. No other animal does either. We do both, depending on the season and the need. Somehow, I feel the carnival watches, to see which we're doing and how and why, and moves in on us when it feels we're ripe."

goodbye my iPod

iPod gave out today, after 5 years of faithful service.

You served me well since 2003, you were a great consoler and friend, I will miss you.

time of death - 3:27 am

excerpt - The Illustrated Man

"When life is over it is like a flicker of bright film, an instant on the screen, all of its prejudices and passions condensed and illumined for an instant on space, and before you could cry out, 'There was a happy day, there a bad one, there an evil face, there a good one,' the film burned to a cinder, the screen went dark."

Kaleidoscope, The Illustrated Man

Tystnaden (The Silence) 1963

For me, the most relate-able of Bergman's "Trilogy of Faith."

Nattvardsgästerna (Winter Light) 1962

I have yet to really get into a chunk of Bergman's work, but I think it's safe to say that this one is an incredibly bleak and harsh outlook on the existence of God. Tomas's struggle with his faith and his disheartening realization that God is silent made me feel sorry for him, and his indifference and ultimate cruelty to Marta, who loves him blindly, just made me feel horrible. I usually feel a sense of optimism in the face of reality from Bergman, but his trilogy of faith is really jarring, raw, and a slap to the face. Not so sure what to think. Maybe once I watch The Silence I will be able to formulate a stronger opinion.

Såsom i en spegel (Through a Glass Darkly) 1961

2001: A Space Odyssey (1968)

Hotel Chevalier (2007)

Absolutely lovely. I loved Jason Schwartzman's masked nonchalance as Jack, and Natalie Portman wasn't bad as the wounded-but-feigning-otherwise character as Jack's ex-girlfriend. So Andersonian. Really of the essence. And a great prelude to The Darjeeling Limited.

Smultronstället (Wild Strawberries) 1957

The sweet things in life grow wild; it'll be your secret.