postcards to faraway friends

I've had a slew of overdue letters to write to friends in far-off places (not really though - they're all on the same continent as me), but lacking the time (tsk tsk) and attention span to sit down and write thoughtfully, I figured I ought not to write, than to write half-heartedly. This has always been a struggle for me, in many parts of my growing-up life, but I think it's worse to not attempt something for fear of not reaching perfection than to try, even a little half-heartedly, and churn something out.

Several nights ago I had a few scraps of bristol board left over from an ongoing project, so I cut them into 4x6 rectangles and began doodling. For some reason I felt compelled to draw eyes, which I haven't really done actively since what, high school? And upon finding a new favorite tumblr that same night, and seeing all these moody, contemplative landscapes scrolling right in front of me, I referenced many of those images as I placed enormous eyes all over them. These drawings were more like exercises, as I was switching from light-to-heavy hands or vice versa, realizing how much patience is required for GOOD stippling, and trying but not-trying-hard-enough to successfully render water. I have much to improve on! It was fun, though. After finishing a handful of these drawings I flipped them over and started dashing off thoughts and questions and updates to send to friends in New York, Connecticut, Texas, and good old California.

   

It's funny and sad as I realize that a few people I had considered close friends with here are ones I'm no longer on speaking terms with - whether that happened from unfortunate miscommunications/conflicts of interests/outgrowing each other, amicably or not-so-amicably. I remember having a conversation with one of these friends a year or so ago and it was so twisted, for we spoke to each other about how our best friendships or meaningful connections are scattered all over the country/globe and are everywhere except here in LA, right to each others' faces, haha. I guess by then I should have known that that person and I were hanging on for no real reason other than longevity/not wanting to feel alone. Anyway, my thoughts on that have changed - I maintain those meaningful connections outside of LA, and have a small but amazing handful of people I've been growing to know better, and hope to nurture lasting friendships with here as well. So I guess it is time for me to make more postcards, to send to these not-so-faraway friends, to remind them that I am thankful to have them in my life, regardless of how often I get to see them.

elyria canyon

I felt pretty suffocated by the urban environment the whole past week, so this morning I went to Elyria Canyon Park in Mt. Washington, which is only a few miles from where I live. Apparently this spot boasts one of the "finest" California Black Walnut woodlands, which were once plentiful in California but now exist only in scattered pockets like these. Said walnut trees were in the beginning stages of budding today when I visited, and they were beautiful indeed. With the park being in a canyon, one is surrounded by beautiful hill-top houses, but as I had wanted to escape into nature, the sight of the houses and adjacent developed neighborhoods made me feel ever more restless and slightly regretful of my decision to explore new places (note: which is not a bad thing - I was glad that I was getting out of my comfort zone). I tucked a sprig of black sage into my pocket as I reoriented myself for the way out, but then I spied an opening to the north, where I realized the park continued.

 
It was after this point on really, that the trail sparked my interest again...! This path took me way down, low enough that I couldn't see any man-made structures whatsoever. Just trees! I don't mean to sound overly picky about this hiking spot by the way - it's a good thing subjectivity makes the world go 'round. The trails aren't challenging by any means, but the variety of birdsong and the quietness of the canyon is a major plus. It wasn't until I climbed another hill and reached a bend, that I got REALLY excited.


See this? Mistletoe! American mistletoe (Phoradendron serotinum) to be exact. I've always been fascinated by their "witches broom" clumps that I'd see in the barren branches of deciduous trees, and I finally got to see some low enough to the ground to investigate these crazy parasitic plants. It's kind of a good thing that I was alone on this walk, because I was positively gleeful at this discovery, and took my sweet time to investigate its berries, leaves, and attachment to the host tree.


Not too far down the hill from the mistletoe-laden walnut trees was this gigantic patch of prickly pear cactus. Beautiful! I made off with some tiny growths off of a fallen paddle, that I wrapped in a bandanna and placed into my backpack.

Around the prickly pear patch were tons of lupine and these curious other purple blooms. I think they're a variety of blue-eyed grass, which is part of the iris family. I couldn't stop looking at them, but didn't try to take any home with me. Edit: They're wild hyacinths (Dichelostemma capitatum capitatum), another name for them being 'blue dicks' hehe!

attention, attention, attention

While cleaning my desk today I found this old freeway map of LA. What was to me as a child an intimidating mass of confusing lines has now become a clear navigable guideline to traversing the city. By no means is it perfect, not by a long shot, as it is a simultaneously predictable and unpredictable system, but I finally have this map in my head, the way "the grownups" did back when I could barely see outside the window of a moving car, or when I could only provide directions home saying, 'left/right/straight ahead.'

A simple pleasure - this roll of green twine I got at the Home Depot. I am totally enamored by it.

For a while I had given up on finding a sturdy industrial-type trash can for the kitchen, but the old adage of finding something when you least expect it/aren't searching for it is SO true, especially when it comes to thrifting! Hello Mister Sani-Can, how are you? So gleaming-white clean and it even has a fluid foot lever in perfect working condition. I love objects of beauty and function. Thank you, Goodwill.

One of my biggest vices though...are old glass bottles/containers. And today I made off with several beautiful specimens - the old chemistry bottle with the 'acid line' mark especially made my heart flutter. The vendor gave that to me along with the two other clear bottles for $5. The blue bottle came with a cork, and I got that with an old Atlas Mason jar from a different gentleman for $5 as well.

Yes or no to indoor fairy lights? I was fearful of the college-dorm effect with stringing neutral Christmas lights up by the windows/around the entry door, but I love the outcome. The space feels cozier, more inviting, and makes me always want to curl up on the couch to read, knit, and snooze under twinkly lights. I turned them on earlier than usual this evening, and enjoyed how they looked with the blinds open to the setting sun.

 

My friend M concluded a lengthy phone conversation by reading aloud this excerpt to me from a foreword to a book of poetry by Antonio Machado, translated by Robert Bly. Food for thought, thoughts before sleep.

casting on

I recently started knitting again! Back in high school I was a compulsive knitter - just mufflers that were mostly flat knit/ribbing stitch endeavors, starting with acrylic yarns then moving up to acrylic/wool blends, nothing fancy. I learned the moss stitch, the basket-weave, and some cabling, but overall I really just enjoyed the simple repetitive motions that would result in something warm, cozy and (potentially) useful. This past January during the bouts of chilling winter cold* we experienced I found myself wanting a bigger, cozier scarf that I could bury myself in during long meetings in cold rooms and stretches of sitting at the computer in a chilly office at work...

My favorite color is green, especially in the olive/loden/army green family, and I was lucky enough to find 100% pure wool (heavily discounted) in this deep olive color, so I loaded up on a dozen skeins. While at the store before leaving I paused, then decided I'd try my hand at circular knitting! With circular knitting, one basically has to knit twice as much as a flat-knit piece, but the resulting product is thicker/warmer because of the two layers, and in my opinion, looks neater since you're going round and round knitting a seamless tube.

So now I am four skeins in, averaging a ball of yarn a week, and I can't decide if the finished scarf will be twice as long as what is shown now, or three times as long. However at this rate it seems like I'll be finishing it up JUST as it gets way too hot for a sane person to even consider donning a wool scarf, go figure.

*because I KNOW it gets so much colder in many other places.

.

This was nine months ago. I miss you.

the world before me

These delicate beauties are Pellaea andromaedifolia - the coffee fern, which is a native California species. Since the leaves are new, they're a luminous tender shade of green, but as they age they will turn reddish-purplish-brown. I find this plant truly beautiful in all stages of its life.

I've walked this path more than a handful of times, but I had trouble realizing that today. I'm so used to picking my way through dry brush that the lush green grass flanking the thin leaf-littered trail made it seem like a whole new place. The power of atmosphere!

This is Artemisia californica - California sagebrush, which makes up much of the chaparral here on the west coast, and smells amazing. Fill my room with California sagebrush, black and white sage, and forest dirt and MAN will I be a happy camper. The smells are half the reason I eagerly revisit the same trails over and over again.

I've had trouble sleeping in on weekends, so last night I decided in the morning I'd go for a walk at Eaton Canyon. I haven't been there much during the months of late winter/early spring, so it was really delightful to experience the verdant flora exploding and asserting itself - it felt like the woods and ground were vibrating with all their earthly delight. I felt like a carefree hobbit in Tolkien's Middle Earth, a feeling that grew stronger as I ate almond butter-honey sandwiches for breakfast on a dry carpet of oak leaves, listening to birds and the quiet sounds of the mountains. When the shouts and babble of other Sunday morning hikers steadily streamed upward it was time to call it a morning.

A friend sent me this tidbit by Goethe recently:

"...and so long as you haven't experienced

this: to die and so to grow,

you are only a troubled guest

on the dark earth."

Beautiful and true as it is, I can't let this be my existential mantra. Another friend I showed it to put it quite eloquently: "I like the quote, but it isn't a necessary thought process for every day." Still, I mention it because I want to remind myself/others that in the face of adversity, however slight or severe, one should let their inner light prevail and hold off and overcome the darkness, if possible.

"let me have the last word!!!"

One of two Kodak film tins found today at the PCC Flea Market for $1!

"The Hollow Earth" by Raymond Bernard, which I got more for the graphic quality of the front & insides, rather than for its content (though it's kind of fascinating, flipping through and looking into the belief and 'evidence' of the Hollow Earth Theory...).

Test shot of an assortment of vintage canning jars given to me by A. I realized that the wider the angle I use, the more vignetting occurs...

Today was a hectic flurry of a day, which was a little unexpected, but it was busily productive so I'm not complaining. After traversing the flea market with sister and mom, I went around the town I grew up in for ten years, shooting pictures of a bunch of locations to build up a reference library for a project that needs to get underway soon. One of the locations to visit on my list was the Huntington Library, and it turns out that a family friend of ours was given some kind of super-membership that extends to additional friends, so as an on-again off-again member, I'm a member for another year again - hooray! I got re-registered, and walked around the gardens and buildings - admiring flowers, and soaking in the heat of the afternoon. Before I left, I stole away to the Desert Garden to walk amongst the cacti and succulents, where I simultaneously felt inspired by the beautiful growths while envying the variety. I got through most of the locations, but as that wound down I decided I had no energy left for SuperBowl festivities, so the rest of the afternoon was spent cleaning and rearranging items in the house. I can confidently say that I'll sleep well tonight. It's already next week!

I liked how this fallen barrel cactus had a blanket/tarp nestled underneath it, as if for support/warmth(???)/protection. I'll gladly (stupidly) cuddle you, cactus!

hello.

I bit the bullet and upgraded my dslr body from the XT to the 6D. This is a decision that's been two years in the making, though for some perspective I've been using the XT for eight years, since 2005. That's like...the longest relationship I've had with ANYTHING, minus family and some friends. I could go crazy and tell you about all the specs of this thing, but I already subjected my sister to my excited mutterings as I fiddled around with it a few evenings ago, sprawled out on my rug in my room. Upon announcing my upgrade, I've had comments like "Can't wait to see how your new pictures look!" I hope not to disappoint. Meh! I relish the learning curve! Anyway, happy February!