"Write hard and clear about what hurts.
Don't avoid it. It has all the energy."
- Ernest Hemingway
The good thing about outpourings of emotion is that their remnants can definitely provide perspective after their initial release. And although they can be mortifying, they ought not to be swept under the rug and denied that they ever happened, given that a lesson can be learned from them. In my previous entry I may have spoken too soon, but at the time I believed I was ready to say goodbye to ambiguity, fueled by my frustration in wanting too much at an inopportune point in time.
I don't have all the answers right now, but I can say my questions are less frantic, my confusion less crippling, my impatience quieted. I feel like we are two halves to a whole that are still very much separate entities, with tendrils linked and slowly growing. I understand that there are some things that take a very long time to grow, and I love this enough to see how things go.
I hope you are all having a wonderful Christmas/holiday. I'm munching on roasted chestnuts and taking nibbles of bacon as I wait for the Christmas roast to finish up at my mother's house, and on occasion running around with the Westies as they take in the scents and sounds of the day. I will go join them, now :).
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